Aries

In The Emperor’s New Groove, the wily villain has hatched a scheme to poison her enemy. She checks with her henchman, Kronk, to make sure he’s got everything ready. At first he’s a little confused, thinking she’s talking about dinner, and he happily tells her about the salad he’s prepared. But after a bit, she’s able to job his memory. “Oh, right,” he says, “The poison. The poison for Kuzco, the poison chosen especially to kill Kuzco, Kuzco’s poison.”

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Look, at least he verified his target! That’s a lot better than some other brainless henchmen! I mean, have you seen Star Wars? Good lord. So Aries, this month, be like Kronk. I’m not saying you can’t fight if you need to. Just make sure you’re using the right weapon at the right time.​